Cardinal and Phoenix

Finding Hope and Beauty in the Mess of Life

And it isn’t a formula either.

Who hasn’t heard that quote said a million times? Especially in the past few years where people are realizing more and more that “time does not heal all wounds”, “Forgive and forget” is impossible (the forgetting part at least-the forgiving is a whole different kind of impossible). While we all need to remember this all the time, I mean, I tattooed it on myself as a reminder, I think we need to start saying that “healing is not a formula” more. I’m sure people say it – I am not inventing something new by any means, but it needs to be said more. I can’t count the amount of times I have heard people use their own healing as a formula for other people. They had some sort of miraculous healing and now they go around preaching how you can have the same thing. Or they didn’t have this crazy BOOM you’re healed thing, but the way they healed and experienced God is still the way it is presented for your healing. It has to stop! The way you heal is not the way I will heal and vice versa. I believe 100% in the power of telling your story and how people are encouraged and helped through it. I have been so encouraged by other people’s stories time and time again. Story is powerful and brings healing. I actually believe we need to share stories more and be more vulnerable in our sharing. They are how we connect, learn and heal, but when your story becomes my formula we are all in trouble. Even though I know what someone may mean as they share their experience; that they of course don’t think it will happen the exact same way for you, It is still so triggering to hear things worded in a formulaic way. My mind will start spinning and wondering why God has forgotten me in healing? Why is this person making it seem so easy? I have been going through hell and POOF they are all good. WTF God? Do you hate me? Am I doing something wrong? Not enough faith? I could go on and on with the things that start to spiral in my mind. It usually gets to the point where I no longer hear the person speaking and begin to get angry at God, them and myself. I can only imagine how other people listening are feeling if I am feeling this way. I have read the stories of Jesus healing people and no two are the same. He touched some people and they were healed, others he just spoke to and some he even spit on( not my preference for healing btw). So if Jesus didn’t have a set way of healing all those centuries ago, why does he have a set way now? An even better question is, if Jesus didn’t have a formula how can you have one?

The way we present our stories of healing matters. It really matters! Are our words encouraging others to pursue God in their own stories or are they causing them to spiral into confusion and doubt? Words truly do have the power of life and death. So we need to use them wisely. Just because you experienced a physical or emotional healing one way or someone experienced healing through something you prayed for/with them doesn’t mean it now becomes a set way for everyone. Don’t go writing a book with the five ways people can be healed. No need for a 10 week study on how to heal others. Share the story, yes! Give God the credit and thanks that He deserves, but please choose your words wisely, because there is someone listening that is not experiencing healing the same way. Your healing is yours and mine is mine. We can not share the same healing. So, thank you for trying to share, but actually, no thank you.

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